Home alone

McCauley Culkin fans, you’ve come to the wrong place.

Today, I’m home alone. Both girls are in childcare, and I’ve got the whole day to catch up on all the things I’ve not had the chance to get to for umpteen months. (Okay, let’s be more realistic…..try to at least do one thing I’ve been procrastinating).

As mothers, we so often lament the loss of time for ourselves. I’m not begrudging this chance to be “child-free” for today. Most mothers long for it. Most mothers need it from time to time. But somehow it feels a little lonely here. The fact is, there are two little people running around in the world obliviously pulling on my invisible heartstrings. I think Elizabeth Stone understood it well, when she said:

“Making the decision to have a child is momentous.
It is to decide forever to have your heartΒ go walking around outside your body.”

I’m pretty sure once I start work I’ll be far too distracted by the mundane, routine, humdrum and office politics, to probably notice these heart tugs too intensely or too frequently.

But for today, they’re pulling hard.

Nutella Cream Pancake

Then again maybe it’s the PMT talking. Or is that PMS?

Run, frosting, run!

Cake Mate Chocolate Frosting

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I’m linking with Jess from Diary of a SAHM for IBOT.

I Blog on Tuesdays


31 thoughts on “Home alone

    • It’s my favourite quote about being a mother, Ai. I did have a nice day and it is always more productive when I’m on my own. I still miss the girls though, of course.

    • Carli, I suspect I’ll never feel fully ready for any new stage of independence with my girls. It’ll just be a matter of being as prepared as possible practically and hoping my heart will follow…..eventually.

    • Thanks, Nicole. I actually went out with my small handbag for a chance and non-breastfeeding shirt. Now those are nice changes. Gave the girls big hugs and kisses when they got home!

  1. I love daycare days where I’m home by myself. It can get boring though which is when I nap or read a book or watch a movie.
    I’m drooling just looking at your yummy food!

    • It sounds a bit indulgent to do those things for ourselves, Ames, but we need to from time to time for sure! And I’ve no doubt the fun and games at childcare are good for the girls too.

  2. How did your day go Veronica? I don’t think I could do it. I miss my kids when I leave them with boatman for a couple of hours for shopping. I think I will be a mess whist at DPCon.

    Hope you got some things done πŸ™‚

    • I had a nice day meeting a lovely bloggy friend in real life! It was nice getting out on my own without the nappy bag and other odds and ends. But, I do miss the girls. Hopefully you’ll be so busy at DPCON12 that you’ll have little time to miss the your kids too much.

  3. I miss my kids every day when they are at school and Kindy, but it only takes 10 minutes of their arguing when they get home that instant looking forward to bed time. I saw these photos on instagram today and you had me craving for this all day. πŸ™‚ xx

  4. I am at the same stage Veronica. Both mine are in child care Tuesday and Thursday.. I am working on Tuesdays but not Thursdays, which I totally need, but I keep thinking that Baby J is asleep or something and then I remember that he is not here and feel a little empty. Hope your baby girl settles in nicely and you enjoyed those delicious pancakes! x

    • Yeah, I feel similar emptiness, Lee. I may be walking carefree around the shops with a small handbag instead of the nappy bag and no pram, but I just have to see mothers with prams and kiddies and I hear myself say in my head, “Hey, I’m a mum too!” She’s doing well at childcare which is great. She’s settled in much faster than her big sis did.

    • Glad you liked the quote, Fiona. The Elizabeth Stone quote is my favourite about motherhood. The heart-strings do keep tugging but it is also nice I can get more done on my own.

  5. Pingback: Forever connected « Mixed Gems

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