A beautiful friend of mine recently lost her baby at 24 weeks. It’s been a struggle for her to get pregnant and a struggle to stay pregnant. I was heartbroken for her when I heard the news but my sadness is a drop in the ocean compared to her grief.
I look at my babies and remind myself how privileged I am. I know the pain and stress of trying to conceive. We tried for about four years before being blessed with our first daughter two-and-a-half years ago. We recently had a second daughter.
I hug them close and feel so grateful that I never had to answer the heart-wrenching question that lurked in the back of my mind, “What if I never had a child?”; that I have never had to face the unimaginable loss of a baby.
In writing this, I don’t mean to be flippant about the trauma for anyone who has lost a baby or who is trying to conceive and possibly having to face a childless future. I have felt deep sadness and shed quiet tears for these stories of deferred hope and loss, though I can never, and would never, presume to know the true depth of such pain, turmoil and grief.
For me, I need to remember that even though frustrations and sleep-deprivation, come my way, they are mingled with joy, love and happiness. I am immensely privileged to have my beautiful girls, pieces of me and my husband, to touch, love, adore, talk and sing to, cuddle, kiss, parent and cherish.
I’m joining with Jess from Diary of a SAHM for iBOT.