I had a close encounter with myself today and I didn’t like who I saw. Despite all the virtues I espouse and try to live by, my dark side occasionally rears it’s ugly head and I struggle to tame it into submission.
Today, ignorance was not bliss but a festering. I had to quench the intense emotion by reasoning with myself, out loud. I had to give voice to my emotion and let logic reply.
Little by little, reason sliced through my emotions. As I ranted to myself, I became aware that someone was listening. She was as great a listener as any three-month old could be.
So apart from logic weaving some of its magic, I am without doubt the innocent gaze of my child melted much of the festering bile. How could I remain angry with my life, our lives, my family, when my children always spur me on to be a better version of me, for their sakes?
I like to have my moments, learn and grow from them, and move on. But some things are destined to repeat themselves, ad nauseum, because such is life. It’s going to come by again. I just have to hope, one day, the sting will lose its influence. Because I don’t like the ugly me.